i'm muggin
and i am feelin sorta happy about it

i gettin fatter
die..
i shall try pilates moves every morning 5 times a week

i'm supposed to continue studyin
but the dns chapter is makin me sick
shui, chicken ric , est and squid are zara-ing
sian
i want that too
's okay i got no more money to spend
jervis said i should save money
yea you got a point

glad din message me
hmmp*
never mind we shall see each other on the 13th
=)

hema is very fierce now
she dont allow mohan aka mocky to play her handphone
haha..
such a cute couple

for now, i shall enjoy being single
yea i shall think of him occasionally and ruin my day
but 's okay
its something i got to get over it

i got tons and tons of things to do now
good
keeps me busy

oh ya hang loon
pls dont scare me like that again okay?
2am calling my name outside the window is not funny !
*whacks HL's head*

lala.. now is that a happy entry now pony?
=)

yea i know
i said i wouldnt be blogging that soon
but i really cant stand it anymore

i'm angry with myself
i'm angry with the whole situation i have to handle
i'm angry with myself for making the situation worse
i'm angry with myself for being a troublesome burden
i'm angry with myself for being a whiner
i'm angry with myself for being not a team player
i'm angry with myself for being such a sissy

looking back .. yes i hate to admit
i became a irritating pest that keeps on whining and complaining about her unhappiness
i became a irresponsible person that cant draws a line between work and personal affairs
okay so it goes on.. and on

i discovered i dont have a passion for anything
a strong intense passion enough to keep me going
i know i will realize it in due course
but when?
i'm so impatient ..
to make the problems dissapear
to start everything all over again
or even to pretend nothing happened

i said i lost trust in people
the truth is .. i lost trust in myself

shui, you said just go back being myself?
you know , i am trying to..
but when i looked back at my old self
i felt envious
i was so happy and carefree
yet stupid and ignorant
what should i be?
hmm.. haha

i had a real funny dream the other night
perhaps i was reminiscing on the past events
okay it's starting to sound ridiculous now
some people can just find the correct phase or words to describe precisely a feeling or a scene or whatever...
my random thoughts are evaporating
...
good
nevermind


cant believe it
i am actually talkin to glad online now...
hahaha.. i am go happy

i had a dream last night
it wasnt a good one
it wasnt bad one either
it just makes me think.. for a long long time

i think i am hiding in a shell
and it sort of feels safe in it
cuz i think everyone hates me
(didnt i said i'm going for a retreat?)

i threw away lots of things last night
and i tucked away many things too

i sorta hate this phase of my life
it makes me feel like an ugly person ( okay maybe i am)
it lets me see clearly who are my real friends...
sadly to say, i found one? or two?
i'm such a pathetic person

i got too many regrets
i cant forgive myself for giving in so much
i cant believe i can trust a person so much
lesson learnt
and i wont repeat the same mistake ever

went out with mudd and gu yesterday
3 of us went shopping for mudd's shoes!
but there isnt any nice shoes around..
except for the new adidas climacool shoe which i saw at citi link
so.. in the end.. he bought one pair at BATA store
gu ..was right..haha
as usual, they teased me again..

wanted to cycle to shui's place
but my mom... is not pleased
"you are not cycling on nicoll highway!"
"i wont cycle on the roads of the highway!"
"no you are not goin to cycle there!"
"but i already missed the last bus!"
" you siao char bo.. who said u can cycle from telok blangah to east coast there!"
"zzzz...hmmp"

i'm puttin on weight!
damnit
the problem is i cant stop munching on the macademia nut cookies
dim sum breakfast this friday!
i cant wait.. =p

i miss hangloon!
haha..
he's gone for his class chalet... zzzz

aiya i miss my class also
i miss liat

stupid glad.. u better call me

shui..when you gonna stay over at my place ?

nothin much to say
dont think i will be blogging soon
it better dont rain this evening

i wish to clear things up
it seem like there isnt any
but there is..
i'm scared

i think i'm goin for a retreat

i really miss all my friends
but
something is missing
i think there's a gap in between
and i feel very uneasy about it

hmm
what am i talking about
how should i put it?
sheesh...

does anyone knows what i am tryin to say?